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personal ponderings, pontifications and occasional pearls from a woman of a certain age living in North Carolina
Monday, October 06, 2003
Would somebody please take me out and shoot me? My frustration level is at maximum load and I am about to board a train for lands far away...
What's the deal? I am on marriage number three. AND with each union, I have learned and grown, but I find myself in a quagmire. What is it like to have someone who not only loves you, but encourages your growth, likes the changes you are going through and finds it fascinating that you are not the same person you were 12 years ago?
After a week-end in a lovely cabin, on the very apex of a mountain with friends, I have returned to be punished with stares and silence. Please, give me a break. The world is big enough for the two of us and the different ways we choose to be in this world. You are a loner; I am friendly and outgoing. You are enamored of the television;I find my solace in the written word. You are miserly with praise; I am fluent in the language of thanks...I feel as though once we were journeying on the same boat, but now the ship is sinking and you have chosen a different life boat. I do not understand where you are in your life. I want to, but you are too tightly wound and I feel you don't really care where I might be. How shall we overcome this impasse?
I am entering into a world of silence beside you. When you decide we should talk this out, we will. Until then...I like the me I'm becoming. You might too if you choose to know me.
What's the deal? I am on marriage number three. AND with each union, I have learned and grown, but I find myself in a quagmire. What is it like to have someone who not only loves you, but encourages your growth, likes the changes you are going through and finds it fascinating that you are not the same person you were 12 years ago?
After a week-end in a lovely cabin, on the very apex of a mountain with friends, I have returned to be punished with stares and silence. Please, give me a break. The world is big enough for the two of us and the different ways we choose to be in this world. You are a loner; I am friendly and outgoing. You are enamored of the television;I find my solace in the written word. You are miserly with praise; I am fluent in the language of thanks...I feel as though once we were journeying on the same boat, but now the ship is sinking and you have chosen a different life boat. I do not understand where you are in your life. I want to, but you are too tightly wound and I feel you don't really care where I might be. How shall we overcome this impasse?
I am entering into a world of silence beside you. When you decide we should talk this out, we will. Until then...I like the me I'm becoming. You might too if you choose to know me.
